“i’m a vegetarian”

so you say you’re a vegetarian…

yet you order fish and shrimp…

i’m perplexed.

do you honestly not know the difference between marine life and vegetables or are you just trying to get in this girls pants?

judging from the state of your hair, clothes, and teeth i really believe that you don’t really know what you eat.

according to statistics the average person eats seven spiders every night…

that would make you an arachnoterian.

not withstanding the sand flies, mosquitos, lice, and ants you probably unknowingly ingest…which would make you an insectotarian…you most probably (being a cheap bastard) eat a lot of hog fat that just happens to be in the baleadas you eat every day.

this would make you a hypocrite.

but, hey, ignorance is bliss and we all walk the same path of self righteousness.

it’s just that some of us eventually learn to watch where we step.

i suggest that you go back to your high school biology teacher and let her slap the shit out of you for sleeping through all of her  classes.

and pray to whatever diety you dimly recognize that you don’t stumble upon a tribe of cannibals that say, “hey, at least he’s not beef!”

because, in that case, they could actually say…”we’re vegetarians!”


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