fema

FEMA alert

it’s come to my attention that, as news of further decline in the quality of jungle life spreads around the world, it is causing some concern among a small group of associates enclaved in London.

FEMA (Fans of Everything Mostly Alcoholic) has apparently issued a global plea for intervention into the rapid devolution of this unique species. “the defoliation of the former vastness of this particular jungle threatens the very fabric of the universe as we know it”. Ben “the Professor” C., chairman of the board, said in a hastily prepared statement released to the press early this morning (or late last night…whatever).

teams of specialists, armed with large quantities of guinness and pizza, are preparing to embark on a mission to
utila to stop (or at least slighty impede) this rapidly spreading (or not spreading) condition.

relief efforts have proven unsuccessful to date due to team members testing the guinness for purity.

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2 Responses to “fema”

  1. Hey Jungle,

    Just to let you know, the guinness is definatly pure. however too much of it does result in a small but annoying headache to kick in at about 2 o’clock in the afternoon. if it ever makes it to utila, use it wisely

  2. katgirl Says:

    Official F.E.M.A Statement

    The members off FEMA have found it necessary to post a statement to counter the gross misrepresentation of its actions by the increasingly “altered” Jungle.

    If it was not for our unwavering efforts in the consumption of Guinness, Wine, finest ales and vast amounts of kebab and curry, we would be unable to validate our methods to cease the decline in Jungle life.

    Although we had many volunteers to aid us in this noble cause. It was decided by the membership’s elite to restrict the testing to those who are most familiar with Jungle and the possible effects defoliation could have on the fabric of our universe. Therefore only our fully qualified team of experts were allowed to tackle this level of conspicuous consumption.

    I am almost positive that our relief efforts will take effect at some vague and undefined time in the future.

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